I love being a girl. I love wearing heels. I love watching George Clooney movies. I love going to aerobics classes. But gosh darnit, sometimes I want to be a guy.
I went for a walk in the park this morning because it was 40 degrees out and saw a bunch of guys playing a game of football. I was jealous. I want to play football. Why can't girls play football too? When I was little, I spent my weekends playing soccer, riding my bike, playing with my sisters in the yard. Most kids in town participated in organized sports. Sports for girls, of course. On a team with other girls. Against other girls. I never had the desire to play football or be a guy because, well, I guess I was getting my fill of outdoor activity.
Now I run and go for walks to get my daily dose of Vitamin D and soak up good weather. And when I'm bored, I go for another run or walk. Walk after walk after walk through the park by my house. On a really nice day I make up errands for myself just so that I can walk down the street. Like even if I have dish soap already, I'll walk a half mile to CVS to pick up an back-up. Or I'll walk all the way to the post office to mail something instead of just putting it in the mailbox across the street. Maybe I should get a dog so that I don't look so silly walking in circles by myself all day long. If I had a dog, he'd be a good excuse to go for lots of walks. I wouldn't look so silly power walking for hours on end. Yea, maybe I'll get a dog.
I hate dogs. But maybe I could learn to love mine?
Adult guys are lucky. They can play pick-up games of football and basketball with their other adult guy friends. They can even join leagues! And play hockey or softball or soccer every Wednesday night at the YMCA. The Young MAN'S club! They can even go to the park and just play catch with each other. But not girls. No. Adult girls don't play pick-up games of football on randomly warm Saturday mornings in January. We go to the gym for our aerobics class. Which don't get me wrong, is tons of fun, but it's just not like a game of pick-up football. And after my aerobics class this morning, I still had the urge to go for a walk in the park.
So why not play with the guys, you ask? Well because I've tried. And I'd like to think I'm athletic since I run half-marathons and go to those aerobics classes and all - but guys who play pick-up football are ... not like the girls in my Step Class. One time a boyfriend asked me if I wanted to play football with him and his friends one day, because he knew I secretly wanted to be him. I went, even though no other girls went, and said I'd only play if they had an uneven number and needed me to play, and then prayed that an even number of guys showed up. Let's just say, athletic or not - I lack a couple of things guys have. Like a competitive this-game-is-the-most-important-game-of-my-life fight, really strong arms that can throw footballs really far, the knowledge of all the rules of football, and no concept of how much it hurts a 120 pound girl when you pummel her to the ground and all 200 pounds of you falls on top of her.
One girl cannot play football with 9 guys. Well, I can't. Maybe you're out there somewhere, Awesome Girl, but for now, I'm just advocating that we athletic and optimistically outgoing girls get together and start a football league. Or a walking club. Or do our Pilates Class outdoors. Anything that remotely resembles an attempt at an organized sport outdoors. Hey, it would give me one more reason to enjoy winter. And one more reason not to get a dog. I really don't want a dog. I hope it doesn't have to come to this.
2 comments:
I think you should get a dog Jodes. He'll keep you company. But if not, I'll totally drive all the way to New York to do pilates outside in the park with you.
when I was growing up I played baseball, not softball. I loved it. I was usually the only girl on the team or one of 2 girls. But it didn't matter. I was fast and the boys respected that.
When I hit sixth grade, my parents decided I couldn't play baseball anymore with the boys, I had to play softball. I hated it. I don't like the underhand pitch or the bigger ball. Not to mention I gave someone a black eye at my first practice. I don't see why girls can't play baseball!
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